I like your body,
It’s . . . authentic looking.
I think your freckles are cute.
You need to eat more.
Don’t eat cucumbers,
That will make you thin.
How much do you even weigh?
If you had a baby, it would break you in half.
I like your makeup.
You’re so fucking cute.
I have a bigger boobs than you.
So fucking cute.
It’s . . . it’s a nice handful.
Nobody who matters would care about that.
You’re perfect naturally, you don’t need makeup.
This one is little’ums and this one is big’ums.
I think they’ve grown since I last saw you.
You look like a famous person.
I don’t know who,
But doesn’t she look like someone famous?
Would you get that tattoo removed if you could?
Are you seriously going to wear that?
Are you kidding?
Oh wow, it really is crooked.
I could snap your wrist in half.
Your bottom lip is huge.
It’s like you don’t even have a top lip.
I always thought that about you,
That you have a really nice profile.
I wondered if you knew it.
Your hands aren’t beaten up,
Not a woodworker.
Maybe a little artistic.
Do you even eat?
Yeah, you should just get that taken off.
I can see your armpit hair, that’s really gross.
Do you have to shave your mustache?
I know some girls do.
Those are way too short.
You’re showing off your legs,
It’s like you’re flirting with every guy you see.
You have a big nose.
You have a big forehead.
You have really nice teeth.
I love your little Paige freckles.
I like in a ponytail.
I like it straightened.
I like your morning hair.
Not that you need your beauty sleep.